Time is Subjective

So my cul-de-sac as treadmill seems to be working out so far. I got out a little later than I planned on and when I came back inside, Amy had turned on the TV for Gavin and was watching Baby TV with him.

My big issue at this point is that I dislike running while having to constantly keep an eye on the time. I'm on week 2 of Learn to Run, today was 5 min walk warm-up, followed by 7 reps of 2 min run 2 min walk. How is it that the 2 minutes of run feels SO much longer than the 2 minutes of walk?! It's not that the run is that difficult; I'm following the directions and doing a very slow, shuffle-y jog so as not to injure myself. It just feels so tedious at this point. I am remembering with longing those days of being able to bang out 7 k, no problem. ..Hitting a rhythm and just bopping along, feeling like I could go for ages without getting tired and not having to continuously check my watch. I know if I keep it up, I'll get there again. I have quite a few weeks ahead of walk-run intervals before getting to longer periods of running.

My run schedule is Mon/Wed/Fri...weigh day is Monday. I won't be publishing the actual number, just the loss/gain each week and the total.

So... This week = -1.9, Total = -1.9. Yay, me!

Trying to fit running in...

Part of the reason I gave up running when I went back to work was that I couldn't seem to find a time of day to fit it in. When I was on mat leave, I'd drop the kids at school and take Gavin in the jogging stroller. I've always preferred to run first thing in the morning if possible. Unfortunately, Dave's job requires that he leave at 5:30 am (which he just LOOOVES - ha!), and I am just not getting up at 4:30 am to go before he leaves! Afterschool gets swept away with kids's activities, dinner prep, dinner cleanup, homework, bedtime, and before you know it, it's 9:30 or so and I'm wiped out. I suppose I could go work out at that time of night; I have tried but it just doesn't work for me very well. 

I think I finally figured something out, tried it this morning and it worked beautifully. It seems so obvious I can't believe I didn't think of it sooner! I don't have a treadmill, but I do have a cul de sac (as an aside, this word has always sounded faintly pornographic) right outside my door. I go out there at 6:00 am and do laps up and down the street, around and around. The kids are usually asleep until at least 7:00, but they're old enough now that if they do wake up they can get themselves some breakfast or help Gavin if he wakes up. And if they do need me urgently, I'm just outside on the street.

Here's my little workout spot:

I really hope this will work! Week 2 of Learn to Run 10k starts on Sunday.

I'm Ba-a-a-a-ack

Um, yeah, I haven't posted for such a long time, I actually forgot how my blog works! As in how to get into the dashboard. This blog seems to be in its death throes, in danger of becoming a necroblog. So here's a little CPR. Get the paddles!

It's been a rough half-year or so. My dad passed away unbelievably quickly from cancer in January. It was really tough. For me it triggered a bout of depression such that I struggled to do anything else than what was absolutely required and expected of me. Stuff for work and family got done, but I felt like a black hole was sucking me in and I just couldn't get away from it. It wasn't until my hubby asked why I seemed to be in such a funk, and I replied, "I don't know. I just suck," that I heard myself and clued into what was happening. Messed up sleep patterns, drinking too much too often, low energy, no enjoyment in anything. Classic depression. Off to the doctor I go, he ups my anti-depressant dosage and...voila...I am coming back to myself. Finally.

Unfortunately, six months of inertia has resulted in me being the heaviest I think I've ever weighed, aside from post-partum poundage. It makes the coming-back-to-myself that much more challenging. It's a decision to make though: to wallow or move on. I finally feel like giving a crap about what I eat and have even decided to venture back into running. I think that is mostly what these posts will be about for the next while.

So running. Wow, it's hard when you haven't done it for a while! and when you're carting around ?? extra lbs. (I know no-one really reads this, but I'm still not up to posting my weight for the world to see). I started back on the good old "Learn to Run 10K" program for preparing for the Sun Run (which I am not preparing for, btw). I just would like to be able to run for more than 5 minutes without feeling like I am going to puke. Or need the paddles (see how I did that?).

Reviving me. Reviving my blog.

I'm b-a-a-a-ack!

New Year, New Post

Ok, so I've been a little busy the past year and two months since my last post.

Awesome stuff that has happened:

• decided to pursue becoming a music teacher and managed to make it happen! Best move for me, ever.
• fantastic new friends and experiences with them.
• working full time...and really enjoying it.
• kids are great. Trevor and Amy are at the lovely gangly stage of tweenness where they are all long-limbed and horse-toothed, but don't smell like adolescence yet. Gavin is 2.5 (what?!), almost potty trained, talking up a storm in Spanish and English and I can actually understand him 80% of the time!
• just got back from Mexican vacation where I got to spend a ton of time with my family and fell in love with all of them all over again.
• wicked New Year's dance party at our house!

Sucky stuff:

• my dad is not well, neither is my grandpa.
• I'm worried about my mom (see above).
• even though I love the direction my career has taken, I may have lost a friend as a result.
• weight gain - UGH!! The bane of my existence. Stupid wine and pasta.

All in all, my life has been clicking along pretty nicely, but since learning about my dad's illness, I've been in a bit of funk. I've always found writing helps me get my head sorted out. Or at least vent.

So, it's a new year, time to dive back into the madness of our family schedule while still finding some time to focus on me so I don't totally lose myself in the frenzy.

In the meantime, here are some of the latest pix:

Crafty for a Cause

I am not crafty. I am a good starter of projects, jumping in with gusto...and then. The glue oozes where it isn't supposed to and then I lose patience and measure haphazardly, and whatever I'm making ends up lopsided. And tossed aside.

I should also mention that I got tossed out of Grade 8 sewing. The small bit of my apron that I had managed to put together was looking rather asymmetrical and then I broke a sewing machine. My teacher sent me to the library to do a book report instead.

That's why I am totally amazed that I managed to make something useful and actually kind of cute!

I got invited to join a facebook group devoted to creating little, purple, knitted or crocheted baby caps to be sent out to new mothers along with a DVD outlining "The Period of PURPLE Crying." PURPLE is an acronym for:


Peak of crying
Unexpected
Resists soothing
Pain-like face
Long lasting
Evening


...and the whole point of the program is to prevent shaken baby syndrome.

When I first saw the facebook page I glossed over it thinking that I had nothing to offer, and then I saw a post with a link to a "super easy pattern anyone could do." How could I resist an invitation like that, especially during the summer when I had a little extra time?

So I got a crochet hook and some beautiful, soft, purple baby yarn, fired up "how to crochet" on YouTube, and here is the result.






As a group, they remain lopsided, but taken individually, they're pretty cute. The one on the top right will be just right for someone's preemie.



If you're interested in participating, hats can be dropped off until November 22.

A Bad Case of Busy-itis

Look at me, three posts in one week?! Who do I think I am??

I just came across this post by Megan Francis about people who go around citing their laundry list of daily activities in an effort to sound busy/useful/productive but actually come across as self-absorbed and whiny. Because everyone is busy, why waste time one-upping each other over who is the busiest, right?

In reading this post, I realized I have had busy-itis in a bad way this fall. People who innocently ask me, "how's it going?" are just making chit-chat, but for some reason I find myself listing off all the craziness of our family schedule when a simple, "Fine, thanks, how are you?" would have sufficed.

I think part of the reason I keep doing this is because I cannot possibly hold all of the Google Calendar information for our family in our head for more than one day at a time, and my compulsion to recite the day's activities to anyone who will listen is really just an effort to try to keep track of everything I am supposed to be doing. You know, the way someone might repeat a phone number several times outloud in order to try to memorize it.... What, not everyone does that? Must just be me.

Anecdote to illustrate my point...Two days ago, Dave suggested we should all go to an upcoming hockey game on the weekend. I said sure. I didn't actually enter it on the calendar, he did, therefore it didn't enter my consciousness and wouldn't until Saturday morning when I scanned the calendar for the weekend of nuttiness. In the meantime, I got called to work at my second job because the Whitecaps are still in the playoffs. I panicked and made the fatal mistake of agreeing to take a shift without first consulting the calendar. Really, by now I should know better. Of course they conflict.

And of course, I realized the problem this evening when Dave, completely out of the blue, asked if we were still good to go to the game on the weekend. When I grimaced and said that I had mistakenly agreed to take a shift, the look on his face was of utter disappointment and irritation with having been saddled with such a space cadet.

Anyway, clearly I actually AM too busy...I can hardly keep things straight anymore. This has become my whole life and it's way out of whack. Time to start moving toward a lifestyle where I can honestly answer, "Fine," when someone asks how things are going.

Five Family Pictures

Here are five family pictures from the past several months that are some of my favourites. Actually, the real reason I am posting them is so that Trevor can use this for his school project...hope it works!

Dave, Amy, and Trevor on their way to the Women's Gold Medal hockey game.

Jill, Amy, and Trevor before the game.

Amy and Grandma McQueen, the Canucks fans.

Grandpa McQueen's birthday party, May 2010

Gavin at 16 months (August 2010)