All of a sudden, about two weeks ago, Gavin figured out that I still exist after I leave him to go to sleep (curse you, object permanence!). And ever since, my previously magical sleeper has been a demon about going to bed.
When Trevor was about this age (8 months), I did some form of modified cry-it-out to get him to go to sleep. What I remember about it was this: it took forever and involved me traipsing in at specified time intervals to "soothe" him without picking him up. But everytime I went in, he would get all upset again because I wasn't picking him up and cuddling him - again. It was like repeated rejection. Eventually, he did learn to get himself to sleep has been a pretty good sleeper ever since and seems not to be too scarred by the experience (though it was certainly unpleasant during the process for everyone living in our house).
As usual, I barely remember this phase with Amy. I think it's because we were in the middle of trying to "train" Trevor to stay in bed so we were parked outside their bedrooms playing cards on the floor; Amy could hear and see us out there so she just crashed around in her crib amusing herself until she got tired enough to go to sleep on her own. There was no conscious training involved, we were just in baby/toddler survival mode.
Fast forward six years to my sweet angel, Gavin. I was feeling like cry-it-out was rather unpalatable this time around. I bought a book called "The No-Cry Sleep Solution," by Elizabeth Pantley. I found the premise very appealing; you gradually shift your baby's sleep associations and behaviour through making gentle changes. I bought a notebook for making sleep logs so I could track his behaviour, and thought I had committed to this plan for the next 10 days.
I'm on Day 2 and ready to throw in the towel. See, he WAS a very good sleeper. It's like we're starting from scratch. And since the primary goal with this approach is no-cry, it seems like I am just reinforcing his fussy behaviour. Everytime it is time for a nap or to settle down from a night-waking, I go in and he just gets all riled up when he sees me. Each night this week it has taken progressively longer for him to get to sleep and when he enters light sleep he pops wide awake and wants me wants me wants me! Last night it was from 10:00 pm until 1:30 am!!
I also get the importance of naps in preventing overtiredness at bedtime and helping to ensure a good night's sleep. So I went to put him down for a nap this morning at 10:15, as he seemed to be getting tired. At this writing, it is 11:20. He woke up at 10:30 or so and has been crying ever since. I went in once to replace his soother and he just got more upset. I know he needs to sleep, and I am so fed up with this after three whole days of it (sorry, those of you who live this nightmare for 2 years or more), I am not going in there. I have a shitload of things to do around here, Amy's home sick today (again) and can only amuse herself for so long quietly. So I'm not going in, no-cry method be damned. I am just not patient enough for that.
Until I can't stand the crying anymore, that is....OMG! I think he finally went to sleep! Oh please, I hope I didn't just jinx it...fingers crossed for me!
Everyone approaches babies and sleeping differently; I welcome your thoughts/suggestions/comments. Unless they involve name-calling because I let him cry it out today, you're welcome to disagree but be nice, please. I just really need some sleep.
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